Examples - Hand Strengthening Activities Through Daily Tasks (Age 4)

Following on from my previous blog about chores here are practical everyday tasks that can help strengthen your child's hands and can fit well on their daily after school chores list.

See what might suit your family:

Important Safety Note

At this age most chores require the help of a parent or adult or at the very least for the adult to be nearby completing another task in the same "zone" so they feel your support and you can encourage them now and again, slowly withdrawing over time. Be ready to jump in if you see them struggle. Over time only jump in verbally and then don't jump in.

Be certain you are setting them up for success and not failure so they can build on their successes and feel ready to level up! (Meaning - make sure it is possible!). Obviously some of these may not work in your situation but hopefully some do. Of course if your child does something unsafe you should be close enough to jump in and assist quickly. Consider the whole environment for safety and plan appropriately for a time when your child can “help” and you can give them the attention they need for this to be successful. If you are rushing and stressed, or on the phone to a friend and not available to your child then they will not associate this time positively. Being in the room is not enough, please be mindfully present with your child and treasure this wonderful opportunity. Watch your breathing rate, watch your tone. If you need to ask someone else to help you help your child then go ahead and ask a friend.

Laundry Activities

Help with Laundry: Encourage them to help fold small items like washcloths and sort socks into pairs. Pinching and grasping the fabric will be a great exercise. If they can, you can show them how to fold the socks together (just the very top, grasping 3 parts on one side and 1 part on the other - it will take some coaching. Start with thin socks and maybe just 2 pairs until it is "checked off" their list, then build up). They can also use a T-shirt folder (plastic gadget available on Amazon/Ali-express, or you can make one out of cardboard) which will require practice laying out the T-shirt, spreading it flat, organizing it nicely, before folding it. This will give lots of sensory stimulation to their hands which helps the whole hand become more aware of its "parts".

Clothes peg hanging: rig up a long piece of washing line string (typically it is nylon string) at their height (or zig zag it so there are 2 or 3 lines in one area) so that they can "help" to peg out underwear and baby clothes, flannels, tea towels etc. This task makes a visual mess of your lounge I know, sorry, plus visitors will all get to admire your underwear!, but the benefits are huge and it's only for a few months. Just think back to the days when it was all on the line in the garden for all to see anyway! They will need to work hard to open the peg between thumb and first finger without it flicking away (working the web space and thumb thenar muscles so effectively) and then also coordinate the other hand to hold the item they are pegging (or hang half the fabric over so it doesn't fall when they let go of it and can fully focus on the challenge of the peg). Consider how hard your pegs are to open. Make sure the first pegs they try are a little easier to open and close. Some springs are super tough. You can then grade the challenge up once they have got the hang of it by mixing in half the pegs with more difficult pegs. (Don't tell them, just say you lost some so you bought some new ones!)

Kitchen Activities

Kitchen Tasks: Let them help stir batter, knead pizza dough, or use cookie cutters under supervision. Simple "muffin" recipes actually work better when not over-stirred. They can just use a fork to mix it up. (see recipe example attached). Alternatively, make "jam tarts" - super simple and require them to cut out the circles with the cookie cutter then rotate it side to side. Then pinch up the edge gently to place in the metal tray holes. You can also use store bought pastry (not puff pastry, needs to be shortcrust pastry) to start with but as they get stronger ask them to combine the dough with their hands and bash/roll/squish it into a nice ball. https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/272455/jam-tarts/

Excuse the well loved and cake-mixture-smeared recipe photo! I typically halve the sugar as this is a USA book :-), I also freeze bananas in pieces so I can use them when wanted and 30 seconds in the microwave has them sufficiently mushy and ready to combine.

Self-Care Activities

Dress Up Practice: Work on buttons, zippers, and snaps on their own clothing. Allow extra time before going out so they can work on it slowly and without pressure.

Cleaning Activities

Clean Up Time: Have them help wipe tables with a cloth, practicing rinsing and wringing out the cloth. This will help them form curves of their hand and become more aware of the parts of their hand to use them all effectively. Wringing out will add strength and tone.

Clean up Time 2: Use a small dustpan and brush. Your child can be in charge of sweeping up under the dinner table after meals and checking for crumbs. (this will support their attention to detail, body awareness as well as hand and wrist skills as they crawl around)

Dish Washing: Allow them to help wash plastic dishes, squeezing sponges and practicing gripping plates when they are slippery in water and suds. Advance to non-valuable crockery when you think they are ready and can cope if an accident happens. Working with crockery adds a need to hold on carefully and grade the force we apply. It's easier not to care so much when it's plastic. If an accident does happen (obviously they should be supervised) damage to THEM is the only thing to worry about.

Remind them that when we are doing brave things and learning great skills sometimes mistakes will happen. If we never try that's the really big mistake. So actually something going wrong is great evidence that they are brave and learning new skills!

Daily Life Skills

Door Opening: Encourage them to turn doorknobs and open/close cabinet doors independently. House door key - You can get a large plastic cover to go on your house key and make it a bit bigger (designed for arthritis) which will make the job easier as they build skill. Options range from a little bigger to gigantic. Maybe there is a happy middle ground you can still tolerate in your handbag?

Pet Care Activities

Pet Care: If you have pets maybe they can help scoop dry food or hold the leash during walks (you can have a second leash in case the dog pulls so they are safe, but a little tension will help remind them to hold tight while they are figuring it out and will be a great hand grip workout).

Dog bowls are often heavy but if they want to try (and it is safe to do so) they can be the one to bring the dog bowl to the floor. You know your dog and child. Do not practice this with a dog you do not know. Food can be a very risky zone for a dog to be protective or aggressive if they are not properly trained and socialised - but that is a different blog post!

Meal Preparation

Meal Prep: Let them chop wherever possible (with blunt or appropriate plastic knife, ensuring they are sitting down and in a stable position away from other little ones). They can make pieces of cheese/salami smaller to top mini pita pizzas, prepare bananas or other soft fruit, slice mushrooms or pineapple pieces, snip herbs with scissors inside a plastic cup (always the kid's job when herbs need chopping in my house!), open sealed snack bags, pod peas from their natural shells (if you can get some), or help arrange fruit on plates for snack time. Of course they don't "need" chopping… and it might be easier to do all this yourself… but don't tell them that. They "DO actually NEED to be smaller", (because you need it that way) and you are "so grateful they are there to help you!" :-)

Additional Activities

Add a grasp task to get to something they want: Put snacks or favoured toys inside containers with side clasp fasteners (big enough for success - like lock and lock style).

Lay the table: Your child can take items you pass them and place them nicely on the table for dinner. Carrying and arranging, coordinating several safe cutlery pieces in their hands at the same time, these all require lots of in-hand manipulation skills. Place a mat printable for your child to lay the table for dinner or for breakfast the night before. (remember to praise the effort not necessarily the result and if something is out of place ask, curiously or playfully, hmmm… I wonder if the forks know they are in the knife's seat;-) or hmmm, what is missing? Give them time to consider it while you look busy with something else and see if they can spot it first or tap the area on the table once subtly to subconsciously draw their attention to the place you want them to look).

Safety Note

SAFETY - Remember when carrying cutlery their arm holding the items should be beside their body, forearm/wrist on their hip, fist holding cutlery and elbow straight with the point of the cutlery/scissors etc pointing to the floor. This way if they fall the cutlery is lowest and not in front of their body.

Summary

Hopefully this gives you a flavour of the kinds of activities your four-year-old can be starting to engage in. Remember children all develop any unique way and at their own pace. They will have different interests and it is typically a good idea to be guided by what interest them. If they clearly show an interest in helping you in the kitchen, try to find something there that they can do rather than stick rigidly to "your plan". Equally, your child may get to these activities several years later. That doesn't mean they are delayed, they may have been practising some other area of skilled development that interested them a lot more. Just keep these kinds of activities in mind so you can offer the opportunity and see what happens. It might be that when you offer a task you or your child think of something completely different that they would like to develop a skill in and a way that they can "help" some other way.

Remember the goal is skill development, as well as emotional and social growth. If you haven't read my previous blog about chores, please do as it gives the context for these activities.